Hold My Calls

I will be . . .

1) Hurrying outside to get my mile in before it gets too dark.

2) Making raspberry jam (good pickin' today after a sunny week) if I remember to buy more sugar while out on walk, see #1.

3) Smiling ear to ear. Please jump on Yarn-A-Go-Go blog on my blogroll to celebrate with Rachael Herron, newly published writer. I have followed her blog for 4 years or so, almost did Nanowrimo because of her. Every now and then I leave a comment for her which she graciously answers in her totally upbeat way. She rocks and is enjoying the unveiling of her first book of a three book contract, I just got to hear her voice for the first time! My dearly departed sister is smiling over my shoulder at all this because she is the one who turned me on to her blog, the only one that I had ever followed before I caught on to 100 Sober Blogs a year ago.

What is good about today is that sometimes success comes to those who work hard and are kind to others. Rock On, Bloggers, Rock On.

The Virtue Trap

Cameron describes the faux spirituality arising from the virtue trap, akin to feeling superiority over others. The virtue trap alludes to cultivating patience and generosity beyond the bounds of average human nature, we proclaim ourselves above it. Taking the high road until we can no longer find our way home, a lonely solitude, we no longer trust compliments because our behavior has become estranged from our true self. In psychiatric jargon, we have dissociated. On the outside, we look fine. On the inside, we cannot find ourselves.

What's good about today is experimenting with being 'pretty good' instead of excellent, without fault. Let me take today to adjust my expectations of myself and listen for my internal voice.

"Dependence on the creator within

is really freedom from all other dependencies. Paradoxically, it is also the only route to real intimacy with other human beings. Freed from our terrible fears of abandonment, we are able to live with more spontaneity. Freed from our constant demands for more and more reassurance, our fellows are able to love us back without feeling so burdened." taken from p. 95 of The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron.

Let Go of The Fear needs to be printed everywhere we look. Okay, I'm going to letter up some cards and put one in each of my rooms, my car and on my desk. It will be everywhere I look and that is the only way my world will change, it begins with I.

What's good about today is that I can stop pointing fingers at 'the world' and depend on the creator within to take care of me.


PS I did get welcomed into Wellsphere if I choose to have this blog run there. The director would like to put it with the alcoholism ones which I'm not really thrilled about since that doesn't personally describe me. No decision needed right now so will wait on it for now.

I Love . . .

~That I have 20 followers instead of 19. Twenty seems like a much fatter, happier number than nineteen. Although 19 is prime, very special, it was a skinny not quite complete number, it seems to me. I could go on and on (moon in Virgo, sun in Aquarius) . . .

~That it is no longer September 11th.

~That I told my secret to someone tonight. No, I am not pregnant. There is a part of my story that I am very careful about. I have told it here and there and it is painful. I think I may begin a campaign of prayer to forgive myself. And I know that I will tell my program friend when the time is right. Like tomorrow. And I will heal. (Amends have been made and are ongoing in changed behavior, so please don't go there.)

~That birds can dance.

~That there is much delightful in the world.

What's good about today is the ability to look outward as well as inward.

Mystery of Hua Solved

Don't know if this is true for you but when I get a comment, it also goes to my e-mail. So, even though I lost it when I tried to publish the comment, the content was in my in-box. The site is called WellSphere.com or something like that and caters to all areas of health, just took a look around, didn't hit me one way or another. I don't know if this blog would stream into their directory or if I would have to write specifically for them, I would think that it would carry over since I gave them my url etc. Please write me if you have more of a clue than I do.

Anyway, it is Saturday, thank you, thank you source of the universe, thank you labor movement of the Industrial Revolution, thank you Jewish Kingdom for having the holy day different from Sunday enabling us to enjoy a two day weekend. Thank you for those who died clearing the way for this and many other rights that we enjoy but take for granted.

I'm grateful this morning, can you tell! A grateful heart will never bitch. It is raining this morning. Even so, this shall be a weekend of fun with friends, viewing beautiful things and enjoying laughter. My house is clean, my wood is dry, my cupboards are full and my heart is open. Hallelujah Baby.

What's good about today is that even in knowing that this too shall pass, I can enjoy the moments of peace, joy and serenity.

Hua, Healthy Blogs, Where Are You?

I received a nice comment and an invitation to check out a blog/site?/collection? from Hua but I bungled the comment and lost it into cyberspace, couldn't remember the key words well enough to google it. Clearly, it's a good thing that I'm not entrusted w/nuclear energy or something because there may not be enough safeguards in place to keep me from bobbling IMPORTANT INFORMATION.

Enough with self-flagellation. I'm up in the wee hours, went to bed too early, tired out from stacking wood but awake and mulling over annoying details like lost comments, work misunderstandings, mysteries such as Will I Ever Get Over Myself?

Since it's just you and me all cozy at 3am, let me again tell you what a good time I'm having with Artist's Way. Two years ago I gave it a try with a group that fizzled but now I'm getting so much more out of it since I've gotten involved w/CoDA in the meantime. She never mentions that at all and only obliquely refers to her alcoholism. I'm just having a much richer experience. Let me tell you that I'm not creating anything per se but it is definately recovery and rewarding. Bouquets to you, Julia, MUHH!

What's good about today is sharing your gifts.

Again Nothing More, Nothing Less

Groove-alicious. Took me a minute to spell that out. Nothing good, nothing bad. Welcomed my co-worker back with (figuratively) open arms. Have some events to look forward to this weekend. It may rain a couple out but that's okay too.

What's good about today is that I'm going to bottle some of this mellow, just like MC's peaches.