Saturday, February 4, 2012

"I've Spent My Life on Nothing"

A quote from poetry in Louisey's post today in Letting Go. It resonates with me, at an early age the thought of being blessed with a life that I didn't know what to do with burdened me. It still does, my ego wants to make a mark. I struggle between 'knowing' I'm just a grain of sand in the cosmos desert and listening to theologians in and out of the program proselytize that what I do matters. Praying is all I can do as I do not trust my best thinking. Nothing needs to be 'decided' today.


  1. Hey, me too. I'm not sure I will ever be able to decide what to do with my life. I just sort of make it up as i go along, and hope that's enough. It's a shame you can't get away with saying you want to be an 'astronaut' when you are in your 20's. Or any age really.

    It's hard to live in the moment sometimes. Hard to relinquish control over everything and freefall. Too used to concentrating to relax. Where does that feeling of having to do it all right now come from?

  2. That question of nothingness interests me. There is the sense of culpable waste that haunts me, but also the freedom of a life without any visible meaning of significance that has no ascribed value but simple is/was.