I'm really pleased about my equanimity these days, I'm not frightened by circumstances lately. If something came up that didn't strike me 'right', I was angry and had a hard time throwing it off. Now, thank you God, it is easier. I keep my insides better protected against the outside stuff. I notice but then I ask if it is important. It's all small stuff, who said what, who thinks this and who thinks that and what is the rule this week, just human stuff, due to change if you stick around long enough. I think I'll be one of the ones who sticks around.
I have to consult with you spiritual dudes and dudettes. If you've read Autobiography of A Yogi, you may remember that he talks about 'kriya' and that his mission was to bring Eastern practices including kriya (an intense spiritual, physical & emotional experience accomplished through breath exercises that cause carboxylating). His school of practice teaches you how to do this over a period of years, I had the experience in a weekend workshop (not affiliated with them) a few years ago and it was impressive to say the least.
So, fast forward, I reread the book, google the school and there is a group nearby. Like Buddhism, I find the goal oriented isolative behavior not what I perceive as God like. I find it even moreso than most religions, a lot of rules, a hierarchy of 'I can do it longer, deeper, etc'.
I was already second guessing my motives in searching out this group, as in baby wants a spiritual rush! My ego wants people to know what all I've done and I tell her to please not to be stirred up by this. Their egos apparently want to tell me the same. I'm glad to find them, I like to meditate with others. But I'm not into this for spiritual bootie. I like to pay homage to the spiritual world, my mantra is Thank (breath in) You (breath out) and it emphasizes my relationship to that which is bigger. They are way too goal oriented about getting 'somewhere'. Can I attend and ignore it?
My faith is in God who will guide me but I would also like your opinions.
(what kind of spellcheck finds fault with carboxylating? it also suggests substituting dinettes for dudettes)
5 hours ago