Sunday, September 6, 2009

Hah! I'm Back

All right, so I tried to start my laptop again. This time I plugged it in. Now, don't look at me like that. It has a battery. Which apparently is as useful as a brick at this point. I had disconnected the lap top completely in an attempt to shut it off. As my computer fixer has stated, trouble in shutting off a computer usually means future trouble turning it on. And so it goes.

Compliance Patterns
compromise their values and integrity to avoid rejection and other people's anger,

are very sensitive to others' feelings and assume the same feelings,

are extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long,

place a higher value on others' opinions and feelings, and are too afraid to express differing view points or feelings,

put aside personal interests and hobbies to do what others want,

accept sex as a substitute for love.

Cited from CoDA 'big book' p4.

I rate fairly high in these qualities, the loyalty piece hooked my interest when I first read these. Nowadays I feel better. Although I still have the illogical belief that I should have never changed partners/moved 'away'/changed jobs etc,etc. I can catch my mind touching on this as if I was running my tongue over a sore spot in my mouth, just checking to see if it still hurts in that area. What's good about today is that I can accept it as part of living in my skin, wish the past well and change the channel to something more current and positive.

PS One of the TV shows I watch is Religions and Ethics Weekly on PBS Sunday morning (check for local listing) which is a great show that carries 4 or 5 stories each week. They profiled Father Leo this am, check out their site for more of that story.


  1. You're freaking me out with this CODA sruff!
    Glad we're both canoeing past those rapids, eh?

    AlohaCloudia's Comfort Spiral

  2. That's some painful stuff about co-dependency. Thanks for posting.

  3. Your list makes me realize how codependent I am.

  4. A couple of these are true about me. They have become less true now that I am in recovery. Probably still too sensitive, though.