Thursday, April 30, 2009

Growing Up

I didn't get into trouble today but I flirted with it.

My son was home and I wanted to go over some financial stuff with him. So, naturally I was rehearsing what I wanted to cover. And I did not like my tone. I was seeing his father's face on his shoulders and being pretty bitchy while I talked to that face. I realized that I was a bit 'T' in the land of HALT and that I wanted to go off in someone's presence like a self pitying bomb.

In short, I realized that my motivation was not in the right place. Rather than sharing information, I wanted to exert my power on someone vulnerable and make them feel bad. So I decided not to go there. Discussion postponed until a better time.

What's good about today is that I can honor the small voice inside that urges me to pause and spend a moment to think it over before I rush into action.

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