Before the meeting I was talking to someone who had been badly hurt by their girlfriend. I said that from an Alanon perspective he would feel better once he was able to forgive her. What he got was an insight that he had been affected by another person's alcoholism.
I spent the rest of the meeting thinking about the nature of forgiveness and that it is freely given by our higher power if it is sought. As Steve E. mentioned in yesterday's post, the blessings do not have to be earned. No one has to earn my forgiveness either. The more forgiving I am of myself, the easier it is to extend that attitude of forgiveness to others. If I am not forgiving of others, I stew in resentment, uncomfortable until my resistance melts away.
What's good about today is that life can get easier if I am willing to try new ways of thought and action.
That Happy Feeling
20 hours ago
the hardest thing for me was to embrace the forgiving stuff... myself first and then everyone else I held resentments towards...
ReplyDeleteLife is just easier without carrying all that extra baggage around now right?!
Trying new ways of thought and action. Thanks, that is what I was thinking as I wrote my blog tonight. A new way of action for me is to begin to attend regularly a meeting in a detox here in Naples.
ReplyDeleteIs there some ESP going on here, Carol? -grin
Thanks for this post. Very aposite for me at the moment.
ReplyDeleteForgiveness is a funny thing isn't it. I was probably one of the most unforgiving people on this planet before my husband became an alcoholic. Now, it is so much easier for me to forgive others and myself as well.
ReplyDeleteForgiveness is a beautiful thing...............but not to be confused with allowing someone to keep 'dumping' repeatedly.
ReplyDeleteBoundaries have to be set..
And you know often we allowed ourselves to get HURT.. we saw the signs and wanted to Control when we can't... better to have let that person GO.... (we are too blame too for our pains). (in my humble Experience * Strength * HOPE ...at least this is how I feel)
I forgive myself and then pray that I learn to love others as God has taught me to. My sponsor has told me that I can accept others as they are and not try to change them. But develop an understanding of their pain. If I forgive someone then I am judging them but I can love and accept them. Just a different perspective.
ReplyDelete